I am not a pretty girl

I cleaned up my tiny side of the dorm shelf that I live in now. I tied a silk scarf to this overhead lamp above my bed, and it has completely transformed the mood. Like, it's pretty sexy in here.

If a collegiate woman took you back to her dorm and turned on that kind of ambient lighting would you not want to do the sex to her and wake up her roommate with the animal sounds you make? Not like that's happened before...

Here's my current sex life:

Drinking a 40 oz and watching the History of Sex on the History channel. Ohgodshootmeplease.

Also, in regards to Friday night:

Yes, I know I was a drunk ass bitch. That doesn't happen often though. Please don't tell people I'm going to kill myself. I blacked out early, so I'm not sure what I did, but I think it involved exposed boobies and beer being poured on my head. 

Hey, you. Yeah, you! I like you a lot. Come talk at me, I might say stuff back. Come visit me in this scuzbucket town. We'll wear our pajamas and eat ice cream and watch Degrassi reruns.